Road Trip With Pugs

2:35 Pack car with an overnight bag, two bundles of pug toys, treats and food for pugs.

2:37 Explain importance of sitting calmly in the backseat to pugs, and remark on their good listening skills.

2:38 Put pugs in car

2:39 Push larger pug out of front seat into back. Tell smaller pug to lay down on the back seat.

2:40 Begin driving.

2:45 Sing to pugs.

2:50 Laugh at people’s expressions when they notice pugs.

3:00 Listen to pugs fighting in the backseat.

3:02 Yell at pugs.

3:11 Spray air freshener to mask pug flatulence. Ask pugs what they've been eating.

3:22 Stop and get snacks.

3:30 Inform pugs that they cannot share snacks.

3:34 Sneak pugs a few gummi worms.

3:35 Become amazed at the speed in which pugs can ingest gummy worms.

3:46 Notice that in spite of their ingestion of gummi worms, pugs do not emit anything remotely fruity or pleasant.

3:47 Gag, and spray more air freshener.

3:49 Listen to book on tape.

4:10 Notice larger pug sashaying up to the front seat. Warn him sternly, "Don't even think about it, mofo!"

4:11 Push bad pug back into back seat.

4:21 Tell smaller pug to stop standing on back seat.

4:22 Yell, "LAY DOWN JACK!!!! SAM, GET IN THE BACK!!!! Aaaaargh!" and watch in the mirror as confused pugs tilt their heads and wag their tales, while ignoring your requests.

4:43 Get annoyed with pugs’ incessant whimpering when traffic slows down in whiny pug version of “Are we there yet?!”

4:51 Pull over and angrily instruct pugs to "LAY DOWN AND BE QUIET!!! NOW!!!!"

4:52 Practice deep breathing before pulling back on to highway.

4:53 Resume book-on-tape listening.

5:07 Hear the sweet sounds of pugs snoring.

5:27 Arrive at destination looking haggard and stressed out, with refreshed, happy pugs.

Gigi 02.07.06